Plan ahead.

I was just thinking I have a lot of material on theology, material for tracts on Christ and His teaching, the OT rules as pertinent to INdian society , why is God a Bengal tiger sometimes and a peacock at other times and many other pertinent ways to share the gospel- what the stars foretell- but I dont have an office space for the same. If we can put together an office here with a secretary, a peon and a local christian - it will cost about 300 dollars/per month for the same, you can avail yourself of an effective short term mission house- I will be very busy with my scientific work so I wont be able to help out with logistics of things but with prayer and faith you can have the material - ( it is written in rough and will take another 10years to be fully completed - but it can start now) and work the other details with the local Christian here. Think about it..

Also

I am trying hard to have a single line of thought ..but it is going to take a few years down the line for that to occur. Had my father remained in Mumbai for the rest of his life, yes that would have been possible ..I would have sent roots down nice and proper..here I have sent roots only upwards given the situation I found myself in. I feel girthed (if that is an authentic word) to the heavens themselves at times , but it is very very odd to live that way. So I try to maintain my identity as far as possible (or impossible)and concentrate on my work at hand. I havent emoted (can you believe that) in the last 7years I think. Terrible . I have only paid attention to work - teaching,notes and fellowshipping at Taftee ( the latter very frustrating with the Malayalee crowd- the tamils have taken a beating from them in that respect- though there are exceptional Malayalees like Mr and Mrs Thomas who have been kind and good and prayerful) Work has been a blessing in many ways but not like the good times in US- you just had to walk to the nearest deep freezer and get your enzyme of choice or the refrigerator and get your tissue culture medium without expending much energy. I even had my own phosphoimager packet - a luxury unaffordable by the Institutes here. I am very excited about my work here though using nanotechnology for imaging migration of cells in cancer. My two favorite subjects were Physics and Cell Biology(also Mol.Biology) I was a nerd in Maths.Could never do the Arithmetic. It has to do with my father (whom I have forgiven and hope my brother's have forgiven him too) He used to give us math problem ( called sums here) to do even during our summer vacation and never used to explain how it is to be done..He would scribble very intelligently something or other and then look up the last page for the answers. And when his answer was right he would jump up and down in his lungi( indian night dress) and vanish from the scene. I was good at Calculus in school but floundered in arthimetic all the time. But ofcourse I was good at the Biological sciences so I dont feel too bad. On a different note, it is still raining here in Chennai ( pretty much unseasonal, it is supposed to rain only in Oct, Nov and Dec-) The city looks well ploughed in many ways...

To blog or not to blog-

I think I am going to take some rest from blogging..I wish I could confidently say it like that girl -who said she wasnt going to blog for the next 3months-in one of the blogs I read , I forget which one-because undoubtedly it has met a need for chit chat and a bringing back into memory the good times enjoyed in US. It was in some ways I think, akin to being in Gratia Leger home ( one of my US friends)and discussing neighborly news and views. And as said earlier in one of my blogs ...I blog to relax..I dont mind getting no comments though fortunately for me I have had only very kind comments sofar ..but I think I dont have the mettle or constitution( it is a Tamil English word meaning physical condition) to reply to all comments ( since like my old bowels I blog irregularly always)Also with age and with the various condiments ( Tamil English word for flavor ful additions) that follow of feeble eyes, grey hairs, wobbly legs to name a few - I find myself increasingly in need of supportive structures -be it long cane sticks, black umbrellas or good blog hang outs - where I can join the melee and contribute my two cents. Also I find it difficult to maintain a single line of thought, the circumstances being such and so (how do I end this sentence) I will endeavor to dish out the right stuff (whatever be it) So bear with me.At the home base Chennai rains are lashing right, left and centre further puddling (if not deluging) a much puddled city .

More of the family

Olym Olympic organizers are starting to recruit torch bearers for the spic organizers are starting to recruit torch bearers for the longest relay route in Olympic history. There will be 21,880 torch bearers for the 137,000 km torch relay route.

Jiang Xiaoyu, executive vice president of the official Olympic body, BOCOG, said, ‘There are two ways of becoming a torch bearer. The first one is through recommendations by various organizations and institutions. Another way is an open process in which public recommendations are accepted.Isnt there a third way - of the Govt deciding - ( at least that is how they do it in India- in a truly democratic country thats possible or doable - it can be accomodative to several yardsticks and standards to ascertain who the torchbearers should be)

That set me thinking ofcourse of the now - the real torchbearers among my family . I think they are my two brothers. I am quite grateful that way that my older brother has neither an MA or Ph.D degree but a very good qualification (equivalent to MBBS) in Textile industry or field. He made a lot of money like a physician or lawyer would in a foreign country ( MA or Ph.Ds in biological sciences cant make that much money) He and his wife and kids a have a very good comfortable life in India and Canada because of him- He has supported a lot of people as part of his ministry. While I slaved in the US(yes yes we are called to be slaves in Christ - that one verse I never forget) , he supported so many people in India. I hope they continue to carry the torch he has helped light. Likewise my younger brother despite finding himself in the wrong city 20years ago(due to no fault of his) - came through the furnace with a good job( he has several awards to his credit -He got an ISO award and several others) , a family and children .He takes Bible study or Biblio study as I call it ( whenever he has time ) , lives out his faith in his workplace ,shops around with his wife, drives his daughter to school (he still needs a supportive fellowship group - pray for that or that he should bring up his girls in mumbai. Pray He will apply to IIT Mumbai - that is wife would suggest it to him ) . Like their father, they have had best of both worlds .As for me and the rest of the household we live in the freedom of the now and present- ( when I think of any good times in US dementia or amenasia sets in - why? read the chronicles of the post doc and you will know why)ooohbut I can't help mention I enjoyed the pies ( blueberries esp) ,quiches ,cheesecakes, carrot cakes, sloppy joes,pizzas and hot dogs ..yum yum yummy to the last bite ( it is not the same here - the mushroom here on the pizza is dry dessicated-and the rest of the stuff is not even available - the chocolate chip cookies are too biscuity . But if I start whinning ...I will start missing my good old church friends in US ( here nobody whines unfortunately..everything is either fine or super fine)

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I was just thinking I have a lot of material on theology, material for more divergent tracts on Christ and His teaching, the OT rules as pertinent to INdian society , why is God a Bengal tiger sometimes and a peacock at other times( peacock's by the way are common fowl when there is no rainbow over their heads) , why is Christ the beautiful rose,common yet so tenderly beautiful, and other pertinent ways to share the gospel- what the stars foretell- but I dont have an office space for the same. If we can put together an office here with a secretary, a peon and a local christian - it will cost about 300 dollars/per month for the same, you can avail yourself of an effective short term mission house- I will be very busy with my scientific work so I wont be able to help out with logistics of things but with prayer and faith you can have the material - ( it is written in rough and will take another 10years to be fully completed - but it can start now) and work the other details with the local Christian here. Think about it..

Total synthesis of taxol

TAXOL, a substance originally isolated from the Pacific yew tree (Taxus brevifolia) more than two decades ago, has recently been approved for the clinical treatment of cancer patients. Hailed as having provided one of the most significant advances in cancer therapy, this molecule exerts its anticancer activity by inhibiting mitosis ( which is the division of the cell into two during cell growth) through enhancement of the polymerization of tubulin and consequent stabilization of microtubules.Microtubules are elements in the cell that are important for mitosis to occur. They are rod like structures that help segregate chromosomes during mitosis to the two regions of the cell much like a rugby ball. The scarcity of taxol and the ecological impact of harvesting it have prompted extensive searches for alternative sources including semisynthesis, cellular culture production and chemical synthesis. The latter has been attempted for almost two decades, but these attempts have been thwarted by the magnitude of the synthetic challenge. The total synthesis of taxol by a convergent strategy opens a chemical pathway for the production of both the natural product itself and a variety of designed taxoids.

More of my family...

I have two brothers who are my life...My oldest brother Premkumar is married to Anjali -Amritas sister - He is one of the greatest pillars of our family -that is what my younger brother keeps saying ..- He is a thriving Textile Manager and as a young lad he used to bring home and show us the various spinning items very nicely cataloqued by him -- the warp and waft of spinning I think..We never made as much money as him -(He was in Nigeria and is now in Canada) - he is the proud owner to two houses in Allahabad ( I cry every day knowing the sacrifices he made).Now he owns a house in Canada..He might not have a Ph.Dbut he deserves two Ph.Ds for what he knows in the Textile world . My younger brother had a B.Tech degree from the one of the top institutes here in INdia theIIT but in Chennai he has had a terrible life - he has a posh rented house (he is only 37 ...the husbands of my cousins here have bought their house only at age 60...In India it is not like US ) and car and all but at a very heavy price.That way you can say my older brother had a much betterlife ...but what could my younger brother have done , my father double pushed him to achieve such a high qualification from a prestigous university as IIT( I heard even Infosys Chairman Mr.Narayan Murthy's son did not make it to that Institute - and he had to go the States- Mr Narayan Murthy's son ) - without the emotional warewithal to sustain something like this - and to top it all his adolescence was screwed up when my father decided to settle inChennai when my brother was only 18 -a young impressionable age ( my father did not have the capacity to think ahead that either my younger brother Anand should have lived in Chennai ( perhaps in a hostel) all his young life , bonded here and raised a family here or he(my father_)should have stayed in Mumbai till my younger brother was 26- 28 married and with child /children and then moved to Chennai . Even now I worry if things will be okay for him- whether his daughters will grow up with a good pleasing life - I worry and worry and worry.That is what we should do worry ( not be anxious though I am that at times) and pray I have a Ph.D certificate but alas no two houses I f you see all my education (ididnt get high marks BTW but knew my subject matter better than most- but in India high marks denotes a culture that must be preserved otherwise they will be smoking ganja I think) it seems a real waste because it never ever achieved the two house status it was meant to ..
Currently I hold a HOD cancer research ATRI positon - but doesnt have the kind of infrastructure one would need such as cancer Institute ,Adyar Chennai where I have contacts and also worked before I taught Cell Biology , Molecular Biology at a Institute called AIMIT where I was HOD of Biotechnology. The reason I did not work in Cancer Institute Adyar ,,,was they did not have a HOD post - the scientific director there was also HOD.I am not really liking my current post of HOD ATRI because it still lacks good infrastructure.But I love my brothers .. and there joy is all I care for. I love my father too ...I have forgiven him for his all wrongs in the past towards his children and hope my brothers will forgive him too. May God be with him now and always

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

The other day when I was speaking to the Director of Cancer Institute In Adyar Chennai I mispronounced some one's name or said it wrongly = so He corrected me with a look like I was belittling their culture or something - I said to get a name right all the time you have to have lived in the same place for a considerably long period of time -Unfortunately I have other skills and I have done a lot of work so then if now and then a I mispronounce why should it be such a big deal - so then he said okay and that is true- but these other characters in the lab they made a big deal of it - How much can I do? Must you explain every process right from signal transduction to cancer therapy plus every instrument= how it works and why not it does nt work plus understand the ethos and spirit of the place - who can do this much- I would say Go girl Go scream on who ever you want.to God wanted me to go to Delhi but I was hell bent on going to Madras since at a that time I knew no one in Delhi. Now I feell 2-3 years in Delhi would have done me a world of good even if I did nt settle there in the long run. Ofcourse after sometime in Madras He said he wanted me to remain here on some important work which I did .( when I say God told me , Imean in the Spirit not some human voice -atleast not until now) Sometimes I feel am going crazy in the head- much like William Carey's wife who went loo loo - atleast that is what these Malayalee's claim ( her sacrifice was so very immense) ssBut coming to my earlier point - I did every piece of work very carefully and spelt and pronounced every word accurately but you cant do that all the time - the other day I spelt Sunita Williams name as Serena Williams in one of the blogs but felt too tired or lazy to go correct it - so I let it go - But yes if you are in the same place and country you can get all the names correct all the time or should I think I dont know - one has to go back to old stuff to see if we got everything right . It is not my fault - there is keyboard slip up and if it is not one of your life's work why bother.

A account of a BiBle study attended -

I was at the Bible study group the other day and lady maybe middleage or old 55- 70 yrs couldnt really pin it down - like my students sometimes they think I am 35 and sometimes 45 but never 70 ( thank God!) This lady shared that she saw a vision and in that God told her the lady you aint seen nothing yet - maybe angels occassionally and thought it was Me but after your father dies you will see the true glory of God as mentioned by CS Lewis -Then she pasued and said I wonder if he(cs lewis) really saw it - because then He would have been dead( I thought as the scriptures says nobody sees God and lives )- but she continued I can never understand lewis fully( that is true I said of myself not all his books make sense all the time)- some of his books are comforting like the silver chair when I am in a tough situation - surrounded on all sides by abnoxious voices(like me I thought though I cant concentrate on them as I woudhave liked to)- then she said - I thought that would be great(. ya even these people say great- like Indians) - It seems later when she went home she thought I love my father too - would it be worth it. And then after thinking it over somemore , she realized her brother was in tough situation that required her father' presence unless someone else was ready to take that place.Men require their fathers much more than women or girls or ladies she said. So it seems she told GOD you take my life but let my father live - surely after my death I will hopefully see you - face to face or otherwise . But then after sometime it seems God again made it clear to her that inthe community she lived - God could not even gauarentee to her that if her father and brother lived it would be okay for them as He thought the father who in his earlier years was a blessing to the communities but after his retirement because new force of evil that had sprung up in and around him that made him forget all the early years so there would be that possiblity that things would not be as she would want it to be. So then she said she screamed her head off.-- So GODit seems presented her with another scenario of the death of both her parents -- how will that help she asked because he had told here just now that there was noone to take father's place for her brother - well it seems GOD said I will keep you alive after your fatherand mother are gone and you will find that good father fiqure for him who will understand him and his troubles in the community .it seems she thought how is that good father fiqure going to comebut maybe God has his ways.Then during the coffee break, I asked this lady what she had studied and what positon in life she had. So she said she will get to that point in a litte time . She then said in the meeting ,oh she had done a lot of everything ( good works I think) but now it seems she said God had told her you can have a very high position ( so that people will not mock you ) or you can have a lower positon and somehow she could ensure her brother had a good life and also they all made it to heavenThe way she told it we all laughed. .It seens her brother was a believer but despite his high qualification and his good lifein the Lord the evil around brought the devil in him sometimes and even her. We all giggled they way she was saying it - these african women make you laugh and then she said he never wanted to accept he was a believer which it seems according to her only made the church rejoice.What nonsense is she saying I thought t why could not he believe in his heart he was God's child after all the belief in the death and resurrection of Christ depicts his unconditional love to all..But she continued saying that every one requires a community to live in and that her brother had not gained acceptance in his community according to his qualification and experience - so he had to associate with others - then said it was all the father's fault to have wanted such high education and position for his children ( misguided ) because a good life is not just high qualifications or position but a good education and understanding of the community we have come from = Christ's love is always there - but first make a life for yourself = I said what if someone meets with accident ,shouldnt we ensure he has received Christ and gone to heaven. She said we will never know you is in heaven or not We will be surprised to find Gandhi in heaven also- we dont know if in his heart he believed in Christ ... same is true of Vivekannada... She said that she thought she would never make it to the Director level but a Associate positon in slightly better institute would be okay for her or evena Assistant Prof in a top class Inst of good standing because then said she can teach and ensure a good life for her brother.Then she said poor thing that that would be her death - getting only an Assistantposition - but if she was willing to die for her brother - she must live that death each day of her life - All these Malayeeladies came and shook her hands - only they understand ever ones woes. No really , they never have a good conversation with me without any cutting remarks because they think I have a posh accent or something ( wait till they hear Noth Indian 'saccent but North Indian they will love - then they forget what their tears were for or in their thinking I should have had two or three houses because I came from US. But when the American walks (black or white ) oh it is the best thing that happened to them .

Taxol from yew combats cancer

T he story of paclitaxel (now commonly known under the registered tradename Taxol ) originated in ancient times. Julius Caesar mentioned in his "Gallic Wars" that Catulvolcus committed suicide by consuming extracts from the yew tree. There are also numerous references in folk law to the cancer healing properties of the yew tree. The modern history of the drug taxol began in 1962 when Dr. A. Barclay, working for the U.S. collected bark from the Pacific Yew tree (Taxus brevifolia), pictured opposite, as part of a project aimed at the discovery of new anticancer agents. Interest in the Pacific Yew tree heightened considerably after the discovery of it's activity against a number of leukaemias and solid tumours in the breast, ovary, brain, and lung in humans. This sparked off an intense period of research aimed at isolating the chemical responsible for the yew tree's activity and concluded in 1967 with the isolation of taxol in minute quantities. The amount of taxol that can be extracted from the yew tree is very small. The sacrifice of one 100 year old tree would result in approximately only 350mg of taxol, just about enough for one single dose for a cancer patient.

In 1971 Wall, Wani and coworkers at theeported the molecular structure of taxol (1) on the basis of X-ray crystallographic data.

1: taxol

Yesu christ is the channa batura of my life
the channa batura of my soul
Folks dont understand it,
how can I keep it quiet
Yesu Christ is the filler of my soul

Salaams to Yesu Christ,
The slain Lamb of God
He purifies the soul
and lights up my world
who could ask for more

If after this if they still wish to jump into river , can we stop them?

A rose by any other name is still a rose

What is the name of the baby going to be? The family clambers ( is that an authentic English word?) in anticipation. I am glad we are not in Kerala south of Chennai where uncles and aunts vote in for names such as Sweetie,Baby,Cutie = and sometimes these are men names and you have a 40yrold man called Cutie George = or 40 yrold females called Rosy Thomas etc. I dont know why I think those names are monstrous but consider the names my cousins have as really very good- Ranima, Kuttima, geetamma - thats from my father's side but from my mother's side it is all english names,Cynthia, John,Daniel , Priscilla etc. I voted for a nice Indian name such as Preeti for the baby but who listens to an Aunt these days!I think my sister-in law is into rhyming sibling and biblical names- so the first girl is Hannah and the second I think is going to Suzaanah-- Who is Suzaanah in the Bible by the way - Anna yes ..In her family all have Biblical names- Ruth, Rachel,Rebecca -- three R's very clever.

One of my friends has a name Chickoo Jacob - and the story goes that just after her birth, the mother called the older brother ( she has two brothers before her) and asked him when he was 8yrs old what he would like his baby sister to be called and he looked outside of the living room and gazed outside thoughtfully at the chickoo tree ( it is like Kiwi but a lot sweeter and brown interior) and said ever so wisely 'chickoo' so here she was Chickoo = she is as sweet as the fruit but a fruit is hardly what springs into mind when you know her - So whats in a name anyway- though she is grateful he didnt say Sapota ( which is another Indian name for the same fruit- used in south india as opposed to central india where she is from- ) . Well the official word isnot yet out on the baby's name and I hope it is announced soon or alas she may end up being called pappu for the rest of her life -because that's what her sister calls her now.
PS.Also I hope there is no NON THINKER"S BLOGGING AWARD - (that would hurt very much however deserving for my dandruff piece unless it is considered a compliment to get a award such as that- no chance for the latter I think in this day and age) BTW, I blog to relax and be nonsensical at times- recreation away from work and a shot at being creative - the latter by a long shot as I am computer challenged - I know I am xeroxing Amrita's words but my grey cells have put a'fully' stop right now.So hope The Amrita will not sue me.Yes Yes the lime worked for my dandruff but I had to use two .

A bad hair day

I finally managed to squeeze the lime into my hair - lets see if by tomorrow the hair is all shiny and glowing and most importantly the dandruff is all gone. It is not like I cant afford clinic plus or head on shoulders but homemade remedies relax you a lot sooner . Egg shampoos used to be a big thing a few years ago (sunsilK) - I remember having huge fights with my brothers because they used to used up all my egg shampoo and I had to mark my shampoo with a sketch pen to mark the last used level to prove how it disappeared. Men are as fussy about their hair as women. My cousins and their kids still press freshly beaten egg and oil into their scalp- it stinks a little but the whole exercise is soothing and leaves the hair glowing as well.

My days of laziness are over -alas!

My favorite verse in scripture is : You are chosen before the foundation of the world ..unto good works..Is this a hybrid verse or two separate verses. i am feeling too lazy to check it..and also give the reference. The professors in US spoilt me during my young adult years-- whenever I was too lazy to look up Cruickshank to see the exact pH of the buffer to be used for experiment , they rattled it off- (Now ! Now ! I had other skills like good logic,exptl design , good execution of the expts,careful pipetting to list a few) My chinese friend taught me this : what? that - whenever you are to lazy to look up something,ask..Okay I am out of here

Live and let Live

_The Leap of Faith
This was the blog I had put off for a week or 2weeks. In one of my blog tours of the scientific community, the untimely and tragic death of a reputed researcher, faculty member in natural sciences Dr.Elizabeth Sulzman was reported. She had taken some caustic substance and ended her life,leaving behind a v. young daughter. I know the scientific world especially in US sits inside a pressure cooker of high expectations, competition and stress. I have seen and experienced it first hand. But for a renowned or valued member of faculty such as Dr Sulzman who doted her daughter to call it quits in so tragic a fashion calls for some rethinking. I t is very important early on itself, young adult life to have a proper perspective on life. what is our foundation?when the storms of life come raging around what keeps us grounded or moored ( will the anchor hold?) . Our faith and belief system has to be strong- to quell the brunt of the storm. I liked what Becky Wolfe once commented on the controversy of stem cell research -- she said "I am glad India looked at the options not the controversy"in making headway and cure for some of the longstanding ailments of tissue damage. We have to learn to make options for ourselves.Work, leisure, family relationships, job options , must be kept in proper balance. We require strong frienships, prayer and fellowship . When our faith and belief system is strong, the love of God and fellowbeing s can withstand any storm. I remember when I was in India as young adult in college, I never really understood why we needed to believe in Christ.Ofcourse I never voiced that doubt. I know during the La deVinci Code controversy, many Christians were emotionally moved to prove the historicity of the life and death and resurrection of Christ. For me at that time proving the historicity of Christ did not seem important but I pretended it was important, to make me feel superior I think tothe others.. If someone had told me Ram /Christ lived a pure , blameless life and laid down his life for his friend so that his friend could live a good , blameless life through the sacrifice and faith in such a person involves putting aside all the sins such as envy, hatred, anger, deceitful, lying, sexual orgies, drunkenness, covetousness etc that would have made sense- I didnt need any proof if such a person actually lived died and rose again.It was like believing in Sai Baba or something . Also if someone has explained what Jesus meant when he said plant the seed in the good soil - what is a good soil - of good education, reality of community and life , breaking the bondage of bad habits by personal self will and God's help( remember In Abel and Cain , God tells Cain to overcome the sin of anger towards his brother who was doing good). that would have made sense then.Also what did Jesus mean when He said - the people of the world are shrewd if only my people had been likewise wise/shrewd in matters of kingdom of God( which is our life on earth and eternal life) would have made things easier -- that would have helped. But proving the existence of God or his historicity and sacrifice and resurrection didnt really make sense to me. I used to pray that God would heal my very cerebally palsied sister so that would be living proof to all . I am glad God took me to States where I understood more of the ununderstood parts of the Bible and my faith was straightened out and strengthened by the Holy Spirit, reading andunderstanding of scriptures, prayer and fellowship of believers and aalso on the strength of faith and life of the founders of US constitution framers and writers. I understood the importance of the historicity of Christ and His death and resurrection - my experience of the good things in life through Him and the many aspects of our humanity,love and compassion and rationale for our beliefs reinforced my faith . I enjoyed life, had a joy amid the steam of scientific life andlearnt to slowly create more options for myself in less stressful areas like teaching and value work ( not in what is hype) and God came through.
Faith is always in someone you know(atleast somewhat to begin with) - it takes time and honesty to further build up such a relationship because God is a God of day to day life and living and routine.I remember when In my early years of research in US , a budding middleaged Indian Professor (married but no children) ended her life(In her early 40s) after a very rewarding career,because one of her grants didnt come through (the couple had 2 large houses, money etc) the Indian post doc from Kolkata who worked under her said - Why did she choose such a time to die just when my H1 visa was being processed. She should have waited alittle longer"